Sunday, September 21, 2008
change is in the air
not much to blog about lately. it has been a long, hard summer here. summer of grief. summer of disappointment. hopefully along with cooler temperatures, fall will usher in a change of heart.
have a stack of books sitting by my chair, but i’m not diving in very quickly. still working thru Sara Miles’ Take This Bread. i’m enjoying it, i’m just not reading much these last few weeks. new rob bell, kathleen norris, and julia reed are in the stack, along with the shack, some poetry, works on contemplative photography, another debbie blue book, some flannery o’connor, a book on the lure of liturgy, a couple on spiritual journaling, and another on the enneagram. plus a few others. no shortage of stuff to read. just the desire and focus to do so.
seems that lots has shifted for me over the last several months. especially when it comes to worship. any tolerance i had previously for contemporary worship music has dried up. i’m leaning hard towards hymns and liturgy. again, i am wrestling with what church and worship and community look like for me. i have given up on finding a perfect fit. maybe that is possible, but seeing as we are all flawed human beings, i’m dropping that expectation for now.
for a long time i have been wanting to find a community that seems like a better fit for me than the one i have been a part of for the last few years. some great folks there that i care dearly about, but it has never been a true fit for me (here comes that expectation again). and i’m tired of trying to make it work and finally have the guts to step out and try something different. part of that means also finding somewhere closer to home. seems silly to me at this juncture to drive up into the foothills to church when i do life in the city, unless there is a compelling reason to do so. and there isn’t for me right now.
so i’m going to hang out for a while with some folks at an emerging/liturgical church in the city. kind of seems like a chapter is ending, and that feels sad to me. but it also feels right on so many levels. in just a few short months, i am already experiencing a breath of fresh air.
there’s lots to be said and noticed about intentional communion and intentional community. more later.